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मंदार शिंदे
Mandar Shinde

Friday, January 12, 2024

मशहूर तो हम भी...


 मशहूर तो हम भी हो सकते थे शायरी लिखकर
सरेआम बदनाम तू हो जाए ये मगर मंजूर न था



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Sunday, December 31, 2023

तुझ्याचसाठी...


 
मी एक पाकळी
तुझ्याचसाठी
शोधून आणली
संध्याकाळी
हसलीस तू अन्
उजळून गेला
रात्रीचा चंद्रमा...

मग पुन्हा दुसरी
सकाळ झाली
शोध पाकळी
सुरूच राही
हसशील तू या
आशेवरती
रात्रीही जागल्या...

- मंदार
३१/१२/२०२३



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Friday, November 17, 2023

Career, Care, and Gender

 

The married mothers I interviewed felt balancing work and care was too difficult. Wives left jobs as their husbands rarely showed any aptitude for childcare and household management. One of the women I spoke to said that she and her husband had been at business school together: 'But once I was pregnant, we decided that I would leave work as his skills as a father could not substitute for my skills as a mother. It was a practical decision.' Another said, 'Somedays, I am so angry that I want to shout at everyone. The only words my husband and in-laws will exchange with me are about food and clothes. Nothing else. I had to quit work and take care of my son, and it's been tough finding the right job again. There are fewer opportunities and too many candidates. I keep telling my husband that he should pay me a salary for all the work I do at home!'

…from Shrayana Bhattacharya's book - 'Desperately Seeking Shah Rukh'


मी ज्यांची मुलाखत घेतली अशा, लग्न आणि मुलं झालेल्या महिलांच्या दृष्टीनं, पैसे देणारं काम आणि घरातल्यांची काळजी घेण्याचं काम, या दोन गोष्टींचा बॅलन्स राखणं अवघड आहे. मुलांची काळजी घेणं आणि घरातली कामं मॅनेज करणं याबाबतीत नवऱ्यांची क्षमता क्वचितच दिसत असल्यामुळं बायकांनी नोकऱ्या सोडल्याचं दिसून आलं. मी ज्यांच्याशी बोलले त्यापैकी एकीनं सांगितलं की, ती आणि तिचा नवरा एकाच बिझनेस स्कूलमधे (कॉलेजमधे) शिकलेः 'पण मी प्रेग्नंट राहिल्यावर आम्ही लगेच निर्णय घेतला की मला माझं काम सोडायला लागेल, कारण बाप म्हणून त्याच्याकडं असलेलं स्किल माझ्या आई असण्याच्या स्किलसाठी पर्याय ठरू शकणार नव्हतं. आमच्या दृष्टीनं हा प्रॅक्टिकल निर्णय होता.' दुसरी म्हणाली, 'कधी कधी मी एवढी चिडते की मला सगळ्यांवर ओरडावंसं वाटतं. माझा नवरा आणि माझे सासरचे लोक माझ्याशी फक्त खाणं आणि कपडे याबद्दलच बोलतात. दुसरं काही बोलतच नाहीत. मला माझ्या मुलाची काळजी घेण्यासाठी माझं काम सोडायला लागलं, आणि आता पुन्हा चांगला जॉब मिळणं खूपच अवघड झालंय. अपॉर्चुनिटी खूप कमी आणि कॅन्डिडेट खूप जास्त झालेत. मी घरात करत असलेल्या या सगळ्या कामाबद्दल माझ्या नवऱ्यानं मला पगार दिला पाहिजे असं मी त्याला सारखं सांगत राहते!'

…श्रयाना भट्टाचार्य यांच्या 'डेस्परेटली सीकिंग शाहरुख' या पुस्तकातून



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Monday, November 13, 2023

A Pure Relationship


 "A pure relationship is where a social relation is entered into for its own sake, for what can be derived by each person from a sustained association with another; and which is continued only insofar as it is thought by both parties to deliver enough satisfactions for each individual to stay within it."

- Sociologist Anthony Giddens



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Saturday, November 4, 2023

Did you watch this movie?

चार-पाच महिन्यांपूर्वी मध्य प्रदेशातल्या एका स्कूल टीचरचा व्हिडीओ व्हायरल झाला होता, शाळेमधे डान्स करताना…

मग त्यात काय एवढं, असं वाटत असेल तर हे वाक्य पुन्हा वाचा…

चार-पाच महिन्यांपूर्वी मध्य प्रदेशातल्या एका शिक्षिकेचा व्हिडीओ व्हायरल झाला होता, शाळेमधे फिल्मी गाण्यांवर नाचताना…

आता त्रास झाला? शिक्षिका आणि नाच? फिल्मी गाण्यांवर? शाळेमधे? ज्ञानाचं पवित्र मंदिर, गुरुर्ब्रह्मा गुरुर्विष्णू, वगैरे वगैरे… आणि सस्पेन्ड! अर्थात, बातम्यांमधे तरी तसंच सांगितलंय की, संबंधित शिक्षिकेला या कृत्याबद्दल निलंबित करण्यात आलं… असो!

'सजनी शिंदे का व्हायरल व्हिडीओ' नावाचा एक मराठी सारण भरलेला हिंदी सिनेमा रिलीज झालाय, हे किती लोकांना माहितीय? मिखिल मुसाले आणि परिंदा जोशी (भारी नाव आहे ना!) यांनी लिहिलेली एक सामाजिक सस्पेन्स थ्रिलर फिल्म… बरंचसं शूटींग पुण्यात झालंय, त्यामुळं पुण्यातले कॅफे, रस्ते, गल्ल्या, पाट्या, वगैरे बघायला मिळतात… निमरत कौर, राधिका मदान, सुमित व्यास, यांच्यासोबत आपला चिन्मय मांडलेकर, आपला सुबोध भावे, आपले शशांक शेंडे, आपले किरण करमरकर, आणि ‘आमची’ भाग्यश्री पटवर्धनसुद्धा आहे… स्टोरी, डायलॉग्ज, सिनेमॅटोग्राफी, बॅकग्राऊंड स्कोअर, हे सगळं मस्त जमून आलंय…. पण अजून एक भारी गोष्ट म्हणजे, या सिनेमात ‘नाटक’सुद्धा आहे… असो!

पिक्चरची स्टोरी इथं सांगण्यात काही पॉइंट नाही… ‘अ’ ने ‘ब’ ला मारलं आणि ‘क’ ने ते शोधून काढलं, असं उलगडून काहीच सांगता येणार नाही… सगळं कॉम्प्लिकेटेड आहे, गुंतागुंतीचं आहे… बरं-वाईट, चूक-बरोबर, नैतिक-अनैतिक, कायदेशीर-बेकायदेशीर, या संकल्पनांना आव्हान देणारा, या चौकटी तोडून-मोडून एक नवीनच वर्तुळ बनवणारा अनुभव असं या सिनेमाचं वर्णन करता येईल… सुरुवातीला आपण बाहेरुन यातल्या पात्रांच्या आयुष्यात डोकावायला लागतो, आणि शेवटी आपणच या वर्तुळाचा केंद्रबिंदू बनून परिघावर चालत राहिलेल्या या सगळ्यांकडं बघत राहतो… सगळे चालतायत, पण पोहोचणार कुणीच नाही… आपल्या इच्छा, कृती, आणि त्यावर इतरांच्या प्रतिक्रिया, यांचा सतत विचार करत, भूतकाळाकडून चालायला सुरुवात तर केलीय, पण वर्तुळच असल्यानं भविष्याऐवजी पुन्हा भूतकाळाकडंच पावलं सरकत राहतात, असं शेवटी लक्षात येतं…

या सिनेमातला प्रत्येक सीन एक स्वतंत्र अनुभव आहे… आपल्या आत डोकावून बघायची संधी आहे… आपण त्या सिच्युएशनमधे कसे वागलो असतो, याचा विचार केल्यास त्रास आहे… विचार न केल्यास नुसताच पात्रांचा आणि घटनांचा भास आहे…

“स्टेजवरच्या कलाकारासाठी नाटकातला सगळ्यात भयंकर क्षण कुठला असेल, तर आता पडदा पडावा असं वाटत असताना पडदा न पडणं!”

असो! एखाद्या रहस्यकथेचं खरं यश कशात असतं माहितीये? रहस्याचा उलगडा झाला तरी कथा संपली नाही असं वाटण्यात… ‘अँड दे हॅप्पिली लिव्ह्ड एव्हर आफ्टर’ असं इथं वाटत नाही… ‘अँड दे रिमेइन्ड रेस्टलेस एव्हर आफ्टर’ असं म्हणता येईल फार तर…

'सजनी शिंदे का व्हायरल व्हिडीओ' नक्की बघा… थिएटरला बघायला मिळाला तर तुम्ही नशिबवान; नाही तर ओटीटी, युट्युब, कुठंतरी येईलच, त्यावर डोळे ताणून बघू शकता… इथं लिहिलेल्या गोष्टींचे रेफरन्स सिनेमात मिळतीलच… नाही मिळाले तरी हरकत नाही… कदाचित तुम्हाला काहीतरी वेगळं दिसेल, सापडेल… डुबकी मारून तर बघा…

जाता जाता, थोडं नॉलेज शेअरिंग करतो… असंच, जनरल नॉलेज… ‘फाइव्ह स्टेजेस ऑफ ग्रीफ’बद्दल ऐकलंय का? एखादी अप्रिय, दुःखद घटना घडली तर त्यानंतर कुठल्या पाच टप्प्यांमधून आपण जातो, याबद्दलचं ‘क्युब्लर-रॉस ग्रीफ सायकल’ माहिती असावं, म्हणून सांगतोय… अर्थात, प्रत्येकजण या पाचही टप्प्यांमधून आणि तेसुद्धा त्याच क्रमानं जात असेलच असं अजिबात नाही… पण सर्वसाधारणपणे, नकार किंवा अस्वीकार (डिनायल), राग (अँगर), बार्गेनिंग (याला मराठीत काय म्हणतात, कुणास ठाऊक), नैराश्य (डिप्रेशन), आणि स्वीकार (ऍक्सेप्टन्स), असे दुःख सहन करायचे पाच टप्पे आहेत… आपण कुठल्या टप्प्यावर आहोत, त्याप्रमाणं आपल्या प्रतिक्रिया आणि कृती घडत असतात… त्या टप्प्यावर, त्या वेळी ती कृती, ती प्रतिक्रिया कदाचित योग्य असेल, समर्थनीय असेल; पण त्यातून बाहेर पडल्यावर आपल्यालाच ती योग्य वाटेल याची खात्री देता येईल का, माहिती नाही… असो!

सिनेमा बघा, गाणी ऐका, डान्स करा… तुम्ही शिक्षक असाल, पोलिस असाल, कलाकार असाल, किंवा आणखी कुणी… पण सगळ्यात आधी, त्या वर्तुळाच्या मध्यभागी एक माणूस आहे… त्याच्याकडं पण लक्ष द्या थोडं, जमलं तर…

मंदार शिंदे
०२/११/२०२३





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Thursday, September 21, 2023

Government School Adoption Scheme

Sharing my views on the recent government decision to allow adoption of government schools by corporates.

According to the Right To Education Act 2009, four types of schools are recognized in India - (1) Schools owned and run by the Government; (2) Schools privately owned but fully or partially funded by the Government; (3) Minority and special schools; (4) Privately owned and self-funded schools.

The corporates and private players already have an option to invest in (and earn from) the education sector under category 2 and category 4 schools. The category 1 schools primarily ensure universal access to elementary education for every child in the country. The government is responsible for making all resources available in category 1 schools.

The recent decision by the state government seems to be the next phase after (i) Voluntary donations by individuals and companies, (ii) Public Private Partnerships, and (iii) Compulsory public contribution (Lok Sahabhag). This will further reduce the stake and say of the government in primary education, along with reducing financial provisions in the budget. This is expected to lead towards costlier (not necessarily better) infrastructure, discrimination and restricted access for children, especially from vulnerable backgrounds, higher dependence on the will and changing interests of the corporates, etc. If you check the contents of the Government Resolution dated 18th September 2023, the corporates are invited to supply everything from chalks to uniforms, textbooks to drinking water, and student counselling to teacher training.

The corporates will be benefitted by the principle of low investment for higher returns, as they will get the land and established school structure (including the goodwill and knowledge base) to project their contribution to the society at a multiplied proportion. For example, a corporate has to invest a huge amount for building and running a private school (under category 4 mentioned above). They can now distribute the same amount to multiple government schools, against which all those schools will be renamed after the corporates with the accountability still remaining with the government.

I feel that corporates should be allowed to build and run schools under category 2 and 4 under the principle of choice of the parents, and the government must run the schools under category 1 under the principle of rights of the people. People in power are trying to sell the public-owned systems for their own and corporates' benefit. This doesn't look good in the present and sounds scary for the future.


Mandar Shinde
21/09/2023



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Friday, September 15, 2023

Article on Screen Time

Are parents responsible for increasing children's screen time?

If parents don't want any rules or restrictions regarding phone usage and screen time, why would children want them?

Written by Mukta Chaitanya
September 11, 2023


Have you ever noticed how parents easily give phones to their children so that even very young children finish their food quickly, sit in one place without pestering the parents, and don't interfere with the parents’ work and then gradually children get used to the phone? What do most children under the age of ten to twelve do with their mobile phones? They play games. And children above that age go beyond games and start interacting on WhatsApp, Instagram, Facebook.

If parents don't want any rules or restrictions regarding phone usage and screen time, why would children want them? And who will ensure whether they follow the rules or not? Today, parents do not have as much control as they think they have over what and how reaches their children. Moreover, children imitate their parents when it comes to smartphones. Children learn to use their own phones by watching their parents use smartphones. Children pay close attention to how the adults around them use their phones. Be it chatting on WhatsApp for hours or taking the phone to the bathroom. What and how are parents' internet and smartphone usage habits; they influence the children. So how to face all this is the biggest question in front of the parents. To solve this problem, parents need to consider the following five points.

1) Internet, social media and smartphones are important revolutions of modern times. They are embedded in our existence, an integral part of our existence; they cannot be completely deleted but that does not mean that we should surrender to them and become their slaves. If parents want to worry about their children's screen time, they need to worry about their own screen time first. If their habits change, it can be easier for children to change.

2) Once we become parents, we start believing that all the rules in the world are only for our children and by implementing those rules, we can discipline our children. There cannot be one rule for children and different for parents when it comes to mobile phones. Parents should be disciplined before children are disciplined. Children should be able to see whether their parents' screen time is healthy or not.

3) Children need to see that parents are doing many things beyond the screen, not involving the phone. It should be seen that parents are reading books, exercising, no phone nearby, no headphones, parents are gardening, or doing any of their hobbies. This can increase children's interest in doing offline activities.

4) After going to the hotel, parents and children keep their heads stuck in their phones.. Never do this. Children will only understand that the time we go out together is important when parents or other adults put away their phones and chat with each other and with the children. Let kids see that chatting offline is just as fun.

5) Practise what you preach. As parents we are double tongued, full of hypocrisy. It is usual for us to do the same 'something' in front of children that we don’t want the children to do. We as parents have told ourselves a lie that when we use mobile phones, it is only for work and when the children use mobile phones, it is just a timepass. We desperately keep trying to convince our children as well as ourselves about this… because it is our convenience as parents. But children can see the difference between what you preach and what you practise.

How can we blame the children if they feel that there could be nothing wrong if they did what their parents do and if they start behaving accordingly?

Many parents have a habit of checking their mobile as soon as they wake up in the morning or of constantly checking their mobile every fifteen minutes. Some parents become restless if the range is not available. Some parents are constantly clicking selfies and uploading them on Instagram. Some parents are happy to see the likes and comments they get there. If their happiness is interrupted, they get angry. Some parents put their heads in the phone when they come home from the office, before talking to their children. Some parents turn on the TV while they feed their children and get themselves engrossed in WhatsApp or social media. Some parents pat their children to sleep with one hand, while the other hand is checking the messages. When some parents go on a trip, they spend most of their time watching something on their smartphones. Some parents are constantly gossiping with someone… The list would still be long.

All this is going on in front of the children. Children are watching it. They pick up those habits as much as they can understand. So, before taking care of children's phones, it is better for adults to take care of their own phones!

(Translated by Mandar Shinde)

 


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